The Tortoise Website

The Tortoise Website
Click on image to go to Author website. "THE RACE IS NOT TO THE SWIFT." Eccl. 9:11

Thursday, 19 September 2013

Steps To Build Self Esteem

By Denise N. Bates


Though it is difficult to give a definition of self esteem, the psychological term denotes an individual's evaluation about their own self. Though many give their own definition of self esteem, widely accepted definition is that of Nathaniel Branden. According to him, self esteem is "the experience of being competent to cope with the basic challenges of life and being worthy of happiness".It is important to understand, when born, most of us will have high self esteem. This is influenced as we grow, by teachers, parents and other friends or relatives. Many have low self esteem due to one of these influencing personalities. With low esteem, we can never live life to their fullest, or enjoy life. Even doing our daily routine, relationships, or achieving goals can become a problem with reduced self esteem.

Building self esteem and confidence can be achieved with ease by means of proper goal setting and planning. Self confidence is a type of skill that you can learn and develop. It is therefore important that you have a rock-solid foundation of self esteem in order to get through the everyday challenges of life. This is of the essence especially if previous effort of building self esteem and confidence were unsuccessful. Keep in mind that low self esteem and anxiety is often a result of too much pressure that you or others put on yourself. Building self esteem and confidence is necessary especially when you came to the point wherein you already feel the following:Shy and uneasy,Lack of direction,you fail in everything you do,Inferiority complex,Feeling of hopelessness or unimportance,Resentful about career, social life and relationships

Never think about your problems and brood over your past. Move on and have a positive outlook, so you can change your future.Understand your powers and limitations. It is good to be positive, but you should know where you stand in life. Never be over ambitious or think about things that aren't viable and be depressed over it. Use your powers and win over your limitations.Challenge yourself every now and then. Change is one thing that's constant and when you adapt yourself to different situations, you can become a better person. This way, you can also know your hidden potentials.Don't compare yourself with anyone, who above or below you! You are what you are! There's no photocopy of you. Remember, you are unique and special. By comparing, you can undermine yourself. You might not be the best rapper, but you will probably be good at something else. So don't compare yourself with others.

Celebrate your achievements.No matter how big or small, if you get something done, celebrate! Tell people about it. Achieving small steps is the key to success. There is nothing wrong in blowing your own trumpet. This will also put you in a positive frame of mind.Use your strengths.Everybody has strengths. Regardless of what you do or what kind of person you are, you have strengths. Focus on what you're good at doing and what you like doing the most. Nobody is good at everything, but everybody is good at something.Love yourself.When you look in the mirror you probably start thinking negative thoughts straight away. To build your self esteem you first need to stop hating yourself and start loving yourself. Only once your mind is at ease will it start to accept the notion of improvement.Let go of the past.The past may have had a major impact on your life so far, but how long are you going to let it affect your life? If you choose to move on, you can at least start creating a happier future for yourself but it has to start now. You don't have to forget the past completely, just respect yourself for coping with it and understand that you need to move on.

Forgive your mistakes and work towards being a better person. No one is perfect! Instead, learn from your mistakes.Be confident, never over confident. Believe in yourself and strive to better yourself every moment. Never put yourself down, for anything or anyone.Remember to have fun! Life is short, so make the most of it when you can. It is never wrong to have fun! Enjoy life and be happy!

Also expect that you will not always succeed the first few times that you attempt to do something. The important thing is to go onto finish what you set out to do.This gives you a good sense of accomplishment and then you will start to build confidence.I hope these self esteem tips are helpful to you so that you can start to believe in yourself and go onto having the happiness and success that you deserve.If you are not happy with your life then it is up to you to change it.Since I often write about healing after an affair, I am asked very often about how to restore or rebuild a wife's self esteem after infidelity. The truth is, even if and when a wife has forgiven her husband or wants to move on, the hit to her self esteem can keep this from happening. It can be hard to believe your husband genuinely loves / desires you and won't cheat again when you deep down don't believe this yourself as you might fear there is something wrong with you or that your husband had an affair because of something the mistress or other woman had that you didn't. This article will give you some facts, tips, and information that is meant to help educate you about affairs, why they happen, why it's not at all your fault, and how you can rebuild your self esteem following it.

In order for you to be successful in discovering ways to enhance personality, you should firstly comprehend exactly what precisely it is that you have to tackle. When you have an idea of exactly what you have to change or improve, make certain that you act on it. It is advisable that you improve one thing at a time. The voyage is more crucial than the location. This merely suggests that you should find out to appreciate each and every moment that you are living. Get a kick out of the moment as an alternative of waiting to reach where you prefer before commemorating.

So statistically speaking, it's very likely that your husband finds you more attractive than this "other woman" and deeply regrets her place in your life. Restore Your Self Esteem After An Affair By Focusing On Your Own Self Care And Whatever It Is That Makes You Happy: It's so easy to allow an affair to seep any bit of the happiness that you have in your daily life. Life sort of stands still for a while after the affair happens. I remember after my husband's own affair that it was an effort for me to even get out of bed. Some days, I would realize somewhere around noon that I haven't even showered or dressed.

Strive to be confident when meeting other individuals. You must also guarantee that you try as much as feasible to consider the positive side of each encounter you have with individuals. This will certainly make it easy for you to magnify those you interact with.One more one of the things that you have to understand is that being a really good listener is the key to enhanced relations. People generally like those who hear their point of views and you should therefore tackle coming to be a far better listener each day.

Show that you are interested in them. Do you know their favorite animal or color? Do you know their ambitions and dreams? Find out these things and use the information. If you find out your wife likes turtles, buy her a turtle ornament, for example, "just because". Find out her favorite dinner and make it for her. This demonstrates your love and care for your spouse by actions, which speak louder than words. Asking questions about what your spouse likes and doesn't like is a great way to build intimacy and show that you are interested in everything about them.Remember not to go it alone. Asking "what is your opinion?" is very important, especially in a marriage. You must always take your partner's views into consideration when making a decision. Whether it is a major purchase or just a small thing, ask what your spouse thinks. Whether you are deciding where to go on vacation or changing the color of the bedroom carpet, ask them. This tells them that you trust and value them and this can greatly enhance your marriage.Healthy self-esteem ensures a happy, fulfilling marriage. Taking the time to implement the above ideas can help to build your spouse's self-esteem and make the two of you, plus any children you have, happier together. It might take weeks, or even months, to build up someone's self-esteem but if you use these ideas, hopefully it will be a great success in the end.




About the Author:



No comments:

Post a Comment